It's stim day #3. I am so TIRED. I have no idea how I worked out on these meds! I slept 12 hours and I still feel so tired. My lower back is hurting. That's a new one. Last time, retrieval was on Stim Day #10, so this won't be long now.
I have to meet with the genetic counselor Wednesday, and I'm still not sure why or what we will discuss as all tests have always come back normal. When I went to India, I had to go to a special travel immunization place, and they totally freaked me out about all these weird diseases that are rare and I can't do anything about. I really hope this is not like that. I am not in a good mental place right now to be freaked out about more shit I can't control.
The RE office is such a fascinating place. It's women of all shapes, sizes, colors, ages. And all totally quiet and freaked out. Going through the same journey and yet pretending like we can't see one another. I can always feel the nervous energy in the waiting room, sometimes the sadness.
Lovenox is awful. It has this giant thick needle to put in the huge amount gel. It's like injecting a jello shot through a straw. It HURTS and it bruises. I am grateful for a Lovenox side effect that seems to have counteracted the
IVF meds, diarrhea, also a new one. Last time, I couldn't #2 without
wringing out my poor ovaries and screaming in pain. I am also not really sure why I am on Lovenox. But I'll try anything, including covering my belly with giant bruises. Good thing my belly is so swollen I have plenty of fat to inject.
I need to get my IVF retrieval provisions. This time I will be better prepared. I'll have to go to Wal-Mart, the only place that stocks the good Gatorade:
sunflower seeds, buffalo ranch flavor (the best!)
Gatorade Sabores de Mi Tierra, all flavors
protein shakes, going to try some new stuff this time
Colace stool softener
prune juice
other juices
Just one day at a time for now. Just today, for today.
<3 I have my fingers crossed for you! I'm so sorry this journey is frustrating and makes you feel so sick on top of all the mental crap. It's so incredibly unfair.
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