On Friday, I shot myself up with Lupron in a restaraunt bathroom about halfway through a nine-course wine pairing dinner. I got to have exactly one glass of wine, and it was over so soon. Oh, I hardly knew you, delicious minerally white burgundy chablis.
I thought this would be quick, but I was not smart enough to balance my purse and the alcohol and the syringe and I dropped it all at one point. Luckily, I was alone and I just laughed. Good thing I brought another needle. This was ridiculous. I moved to the wheelchair stall, which didn't help. I still didn't have enough hands or enough surfaces or hooks or something. Eventually I figured it out. I hope I didn't contaminate myself in a beautiful bathroom that looked clean enough.
I did it quickly, I didn't overthink it. And then I was back at a nine course wine pairing with no wine, which was a big deal. I bet the other couple thinks I'm pregnant, but they didn't ask and we didn't volunteer. Just an awkward silence. I wish I could be truthful and live in my truth or whatever, but I can't be any more exposed right now. So instead, I'm just a Lupron junkie in the bathroom.