Last cycle was full of hope. I went in for my second scan and the nurse said it all looked great. She gave me an $85 Ovidrel injection and scheduled an IUI for the next day, Saturday morning.
Then I got home and looked at the results. She didn't bother to actually show me, but the clinic has a website where you can log on and see all your lab results and your complicated medicine instructions, things like that. She had lied. It didn't look great.
I only have one tube, which should have been obvious to anyone looking at my chart, and I was ovulating on the wrong side. I called the nurse's line (no one ever answers the phone so I left a message) asking about the IUI on Saturday. No one bothered to call me back until 4PM. This was a different nurse I hadn't talked to before, and she seemed pretty pissed about all the after hours scheduling that was now screwed up. She made a joke that we could have sex now. Gee, thanks.
I don't expect anyone to actually know my name or give a shit about my treatment, but I do expect the bare minimum of reading my chart before giving me painful injections and getting my hopes up.
Eighteen hours later, doubled over the toilet with medically induced ovulation pain of six sacs bursting simultaneously, I realized for the first time that I did not have the same goals as the clinic. For the first time, I realized it was in their best financial interests to keep me going on these bullshit IUIs. It makes them more money the more scans this takes, the more cycles it takes. If it works, I'm no longer a customer.