A unicorn is that infertile you've heard about a million times. Pregnant days after filling out adoption paperwork. Pregnant after four failed rounds of IVF naturally. HAR HAR. I certainly never thought I would be a unicorn. After failure after failure, I never let myself believe that, except maybe that moment I let myself believe that IVF would work. Then there was this morning.
I TESTED POSITIVE. I took four Wondfos, and they were all squinters. I am now something resembling pregnant. WTF WTF WTF.
We were in our mandatory break before the next IVF cycle. I just submitted War and Peace for the insurance IVF preapproval. It hadn't used OPKs or anything. This was so bad I didn't even know when my last period was, I had to figure it out from a flight and when I bought tampons at a small town CVS in rural Michigan.
This had to have happened in a Day 9-Day 12 romp on a couch in Chelsea, LOL. It's the only time I was even around my sperm source.
My sperm source is keeping a lid on the irrational exhuberance. After my traumatic ruptured ectopic and the chemical pregnancy from IVF, we've been down this road before, and it hasn't gone so well. I hate that infertility has taken the jump up and down, TV commercial screaming joy from a positive pee stick from me. I hate that when I showed my sperm source a positive test, he asked when the bloodwork would be so I don't die. I hate that this journey has taken the joy out of the one thing I wanted the most.
I also hate that I CANT TELL ANYONE. ARRRRRGGGGGG. My mother in law, my BFF. I want to tell them so bad, but I need to just wait a few days. I need to be more sure.
Life always throws you what you weren't expecting. It's been THREE YEARS and tens of thousands at this, and to get pregnant on a sofa on Day 12 without even using OPKs is just so ironic I can't stand it. And somehow such a perfect ending for all I've been through. I hope I get my perfect ending to this journey now.
UPDATE: My Beta #1, one day after my missed period, was 56. Completely normal. I went to my car and started crying from joy. It has been over three years waiting for this. Three years waiting for this call. I am so full of gratitude to be here.