Now that I have some blood clotting nonsense, I have $1,400 worth of Lovenox injection in the top shelf of my closet which nobody has ever explained. I take it sometimes, when it seems like it might matter. Plane rides. Ovulation. A couple weeks until my period comes. Then I give up a while. Sometimes I take some aspirin. It has no side effects, so, whatever.
Sperm Donor asked why I keep taking it, and well, I don't want a blood clot on a plane. I fly more than once a week, and that would be a shitty way to die. Thanks infertility! At least you saved me from dying on a plane from a blood clot. After all I've been through, THIS is not how I'm going to die, and THIS is not going to be how I lose another baby.
Lovenox is physically a tough shot, worse than any in IVF. (Except maybe PIO? I never had that one.) Lovenox's needle is thick, and the medicine is gel. Bonus, there's an air bubble at the end! The packaging says the air bubble will reduce bruising. This is a lie. My stomach is always covered in bruises. I done it fast, I've done it slow, 45 degrees, lying down, cold press, whatever, doesn't help. Sometimes I hit a part that is too hard, even for this nasty needle. I think this is literally scar tissue from Lovenox. I think IVF has literally left me scarred.
The weirdest thing I noticed was that I can't even feel the needle anymore. I look for a soft spot and just do it. Watching the needle go into flesh, it seems like it's someone else, because I don't even notice. What? I CAN'T EVEN FEEL THIS GIANT SHOT ANYMORE. Maybe needles don't actually hurt that much, and it was in my head? Or maybe my stomach has been through so much, that it is literally numb now. Like me, I guess.